September 2nd, 1995.

That was a day that changed my life.

Some remember the year for when the Blues Travelers took the world by storm, OJ being found rightfully innocent and of course, the release of Windows 95. But for me, my world was to change on that fateful September day.

That moment was the final airing of the successful program, “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous”.

My daily exploits would no longer be broadcast to the rest of the world. How should I share champagne wishes and caviar dreams on such a mass scale anymore?

I would buy mansions in countries I never heard of. I launched a space program just for pandas. I even forced Jim Carrey to make a second Ace Ventura against his will.

Was my desire to spend money needlessly a coverup for some of my personal insecurities? Probably. But it sure felt great doing it.

Once my relationship ended with Robin Leach, my lavish lifestyle waned. I went low key like Howard Hughes. I won’t say exactly what happened, but things got weird.

My eccentricities may not be as visible now at my advanced age, but I still have my moments. Last week, I decided to call my pilot to take me on a flight above the Southern Californian skies. Since I’ve never had the need to handle electronics personally, my butler held a cellular device in my proximity so I could exchange sounds with the pilot through the power of magic.

I caught a few glimpses of my favorite rides, but between the large bottles of Dom Perignon and my entourage of celebrities, memories got blurry.

Can you name these iconic climbs?

This first climb is famous in the history books. Not necessarily for cycling, but for some historical event that happened roughly ninety years ago:

This second photo focuses on the upper part of the climb. It convenes at a popular viewing point where a number of climbs converge.

Remember, I’m doing this on a whim. If people like this, I just may purchase the Space Shuttle from the California Science Museum and fire that up for a joy ride once again..