How long does it take to clean your bike?

Part of what kept me away from cyclocross and gravel riding was the very reason for why you would want to in the first place:

Dirt.

Off road riding is fun, but its dirty.

Cry as I may, there’s no getting around the fact that I’m a terrible cleaner.

When I was just about the road bike, the best I could do was an abbreviated version of GCN’s abbreviated wash:

 

 

The best my technique would yield was a bike that was slightly cleaner than before which would catch up to me eventually.

Once I committed to riding fire roads and the like, I soon found my bike could easily get caked in dirt on just one ride.

This meant I had to up my cleaning game, but once again, I don’t claim to be an expert.

I’ll spend about fifteen minutes with the washing and lubing, but never feel like I’m close to getting my bike near an immaculate state.

How long do you spend cleaning your bike and how often?